On the way to take my DMV written test, I was sort of talking to myself. Rather, I was talking to my Grandma and asked her to help me out, to be there with me so I can finally pass the test and try to succeed in life.
Like a miracle, I passed it!
On my way back home, I thanked her for being there when I needed her. She guided me and made sure her granddaughter would pass it.
She must have felt bad after seeing me studying hour after dreadful hour.
I called Ross since they’re hiring. The manager said he’d take a look at my application but I’m obviously going to keep pestering him so I can get a job. Why Ross at The Plant? Food courts everywhere! Lunch will be fun, the store is always busy which I like and duh, I’ll have a job.
I did some hot olive oil treatment (at home treatment) to make my hair grow a few inches over the next three weeks. It’s actually healthy plus I used the olive oil I bought at Trader Joe’s and then washed my hair out with the Tea Tree Shampoo I bought there as well. Healthy hair is happy hair!
I prevented myself from getting a panic attack. I did it all by myself! :)
I wish you’d be happy for me. How nice would it be if one day you decided to call me out of the blue just to ask me how I’m getting by?
You’ve let your pride get in between. Maybe I have done the same thing. I hope you and I could be at peace instead of feeling some resentment towards each other like we do now. We’re both so wrong, it’s unbelievable. The only difference is that I learned to accept what I’ve done wrong. I’m almost afraid to tell you anything in fear we’d wind up doing this again— not speak to each other, I mean.
I’m the black sheep of the family, did you hear? It’s an awful feeling not being invited to family events or even being involved in the latest gossip. Sure, I’ll feel some tension there and believe the world is out to get me because of it but I know I can’t let it bring me down.
I’ve told you I loved you and I always will despite our differences. We shouldn’t be acting this way but if you think it’s for the best to exclude me out of your circle, I’ll try to understand and not interfere. However, you’re welcomed in my life when you’re ready to accept that this is such a childish game.
This uneasy vibe of feeling that I’m a complete failure sets me back. Knowing I lack personality and never have anything interesting to say makes me useless. I’m an enigma. A complete puzzle, a mystery to be unsolved someday, a difficult riddle. Didn’t you once adored that about me? I was born to be a writer and express myself through the art of writing. When I speak, I tend to get tongue-tied and nothing comes out right. That’s when I wish I could never speak. My words; my language has never been beautiful enough to be heard. You hear nothing and I feel bad for even speaking. I’d rather remain a mystery. I want to be a wonder for all. Why can’t I?